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Thursday, December 10, 2009

Tiger Woods

Tiger Woods should change his name to Tomcat or Cheetah Woods.

Six girl friends in the last year, 18 holes, think about it...

After carefully scrutiny and a comprehensive medical evaluation of
Tiger's injuries, a team of Doctors has concluded definitively that Elin
did indeed use a Gap Wedge.

For Xmas I asked my wife for the new set of golf clubs Tigers using,
there called "Trangressions" they have really stiff shaft, and over
sized heads, the only problem with them is they cost $55,000,000.

One of the big issues for discussion at the Climate conference in
Copenhagen is global warming.   The earth may be getting hotter,  but
there is at least one spot where the temperature is acutally cooling
--Tiger and Elin Woods' bedroom.

Tiger Woods has been linked to a couple of porn stars. And we all
know,he's clutch with the money shots.

Of all the courses Tiger Woods has played... which is his favorite???
INTERCOURSE of Course!

It was no UFO... A spiraling light was recently spotted flying over
Norway, igniting suspicions of a UFO. But further analysis revealed that
it was actually Tiger Woods's headlights.

Most sports advocates believe Tiger Woods' incident with his wife will
actually improve his golf game. "...Let's face it; when you get hit in
the head with a seven iron, you are going to see a lot of birdies...."

"After that last solid drive, Tiger's ball's resting on the lip of the
hole". "Wo! Tiger really threw his hips into that one!" "Over the last 5
hours Tiger has put on an amazing display of  deep powerful drives,
sweet short strokes, and a knockout finishing touch."

Elin Nordengren Woods received a Red Ryder BB Gun for Christmas from
her mom and immediately shot Tiger's eyes out.

Tiger Woods was asked if he had any regrets yesterday . He said, yes I
certainly do. I wish I was born with two penises.

Now that Tiger Woods has surpassed many of Jack Nicklaus' golf records,
it seems that he is now going after Wilt Chamberlain's.........

;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-)
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